Black, Brilliant and Beautiful But Doesn't Know How to Take Care of Her Own Natural Hair: Say It Isn't So!

     Little girls generally do not know how to take care of/manage their own hair.  It's normal.  They are children after all.  Initially, they don't know how to clean themselves, dress themselves, tie their shoes, brush their teeth, use the toilet or anything. So we teach them with the expectation that they will be able to handle all of their bodily needs at some point.  Then there is that day when the little girl reaches an age when she says "mommy, I think I want to do my own hair."  For some, this can be heartbreaking because it is a sign that she is branching out on her own just like that day when she stood up from her crawl and started to walk and you knew that things were going to be a little different.  Well, imagine the little girl that never learned how to do any of those things mentioned above.  Imagine if she was absolutely stifled in every way, so much so that she would openly admit that she can't manage one of her basic bodily needs.  Now let's narrow that down to her hair.  Imagine if she said, "I don't know how to comb/style my hair.  I just don't know what to do with it.  It grows out of my scalp.  It's a part of me, but honestly, I don't know how to approach it.  I am going to have to pay someone for the rest of my life to do it for me because I just can't."  Oh really?  Is this acceptable?  Apparently yes, because it is a common statement made by many Black women as to why they can't wear their hair naturally, because they do not know how to take care of their hair, as it grows out of their scalp.

     Now, I have been around some brilliant Black women including college students, Professors, Doctors, Nurses, Lawyers, graduate students and the list goes on.  I have sat in rooms with many of these women, discussing hair, and I have seen some of them nearly break down as they sit permed/weaved and share that one of or THE reason that they choose not to wear their hair naturally is because they do not know what to do with their hair as it grows out of their scalp.  They admit this openly, sometimes with shame, but most often not.  Little do they know is that what I am thinking as they are saying this is really?  But you are in college, or you are a Professor, Doctor, Nurse, hold a job, etc. (voice rising to crescendo level) and you don't know how to take care of your own hair? Girl really?  Of course I never say this, but oh yes, it Is indeed, what I am thinking.  I am also thinking, this is NOT OK! This is an unacceptable state of dependency for Black women.  Surely, everyone can understand the need for some luxurious pampering in a hairdressers chair but the matter becomes different when you have to pay someone to do it because you can't/don't know how to do it yourself.
     This open admission that one is incapable of taking care of/managing her own hair sends the following messages, as examples, particularly if there is a young girl modeling your behavior, or just anyone around you hearing you state that you are incapable of taking care of your hair as it grows out of your scalp:

1.  I am incapable of taking care of my own hair as it grows out of my scalp so I missed a key independent skill;

2.  I must always be dependent on others to handle what I cannot, especially my hair;

3.  I must change who I am (from a hair vantage point, eg. perm/weave) because I can't manage my own hair as it grows from my scalp.

4.  Although I am brilliant in other ways (hold a job, run my own business, college student/graduate,   have a professional degree (lawyer, doctor, etc), I can't do my own hair.

5.  I have to spend money on a regular basis to get my hair done, not because I want to necessarily but because I don't know how to do it myself, so I have to.
 
So here is a written tutorial with some video insight as to how to take care of your natural hair :

     Wash your hair with frequency.  No, you don't need to wash it every day but it must be washed often. If anyone tells you otherwise, just look in the mirror and tell yourself the truth.  You know when your hair needs to be washed because the need to do so will be revealed to you by odor, itchiness, feel and general common sense.  Any style that enables you to go without washing your hair for long periods of time is not conducive to cleanliness.   So here is an interesting video entitled "How Often Should I Wash My Hair:"

     Once your hair is washed, twist it or braid it and let it dry.  Try to avoid the blow dryer.  The constant heat on the hair can lead to breakage, drying and other problems. Letting your hair dry naturally, without a blow dryer will come in handy as I was in the locker room one day, after working out, and many of the women were doing their hair.  I was twisting my locks and the power went out. The blow drying women lost it.  I just stood smiling and twisting as they ran around in hysteria trying to figure out what they were going to do with their hair because there was no electricity. I  didn't even need the mirror, that could not be seen in the darkness, as I twist by feel and can do the same with braids as I used to braid my hair, even in the back of my head, without a mirror.

     Also, a bit of interesting information to explore is who invented the hair dryer and blow dryer? Interestingly the French (Europeans) (who also invented the straightening comb) invented the hair dryer. See details per the links below:

The Hair Dryer
http://www.nytimes.com/2013/07/21/magazine/who-made-that-hair-dryer.html?_r=0

"In 1888, Alexandre-Ferdinand Godefroy, a French coiffeur inventeur— that’s hairstylist inventor — patented the hair dryer’s earliest ancestor. The contraption was to be hooked up “to any suitable form of heater,” which would send hot air through a pipe to a dome surrounding the woman’s head. "

The Blow Dryer
http://www.madehow.com/Volume-7/Hair-Dryer.html

     So below is a simple hair washing video which does not require blow drying after.  Note that her washing technique can also be accomplished in the shower, rather than the sink.  Believe it or not, there are a number of videos on YouTube about how to wash your natural hair.  Honestly, I don't understand why in the world a video is needed but this is one of many:

If you do not know how to twist or braid your hair after washing, or at any time, it is easy to learn how to do so.    Here are a couple of videos to show you some simple techniques:

How to Braid Cornrows

How to 2 Strand Twist

How to Braid

     Hopefully, the next time the topic comes up regarding your ability to take care of your hair, you will be able to say, I am Black, brilliant and Beautiful AND I know how to take care of my own natural hair.   That will be N.I.C.E.!

Natural Hair Backsliding: Why Some Naturalistas Rethink Their Decision to Go/Be Natural

  It's been a while since I wrote a post with the hectic holiday season and all and then just getting back into the swing of things including the signing of a new book contract and hence, writing the book, which will be entitled Health Disparities and Diversity: Context, Controversies and Solutions, First Edition, to be released in 2016, by the publisher, Jones and Bartlett Learning.  But I haven't forgotten the naturalistas and the need to keep the dialogue going.  So I want to begin by discussing something that many can relate to or have perhaps observed. For the new year, people often make resolutions and for the most part, do not keep them, so I've heard.  I never make resolutions for the new year so I don't have personal experience with this. Nevertheless, I have been comparing the notion of New Year's resolutions to Black women who make big and bold moves to become natural, in terms of their hair, and then the next thing that happens is that suddenly they have reverted to a perm or a weave.

     Essentially, I am not judging because I am of the mind that one should wear their hair however they want, as I support the notion of freedom of choice.  But, this is a blog about the merits of natural hair (primarily) so on that level, it seems worthy of discussion. Personally, I have had my locks for over 20 years and I love my natural hair, so I can't imagine ever returning to a perm and I have never considered a weave, not even remotely.   The bottom line is that I don't want to experience my hair out of its natural kink because I just would not feel right. But, what I have come to understand is that it is the so-called versatility and the flexibility that folks want to experience by going from straight to kinky styles and then back again, in either direction.  For some reason, the European "flowy," straight, look makes some individuals feel better about themselves, even though they know for sure, that they are not experiencing the texture of their hair as it grows out of their scalp. They feel that to wear their hair straight, in styles that are representative of the current dominant racial group is more mainstream and hence more acceptable. Braided extensions are a different story, from my perspective, and the exception to wearing hair other than your own for the sake of fashion/beauty as such styles exhibit a long held, historical, African tradition.  A woman just successfully fought for the right to teach others to braid hair resulting in their getting a license to do so and she won her case.
http://blogs.wsj.com/law/2015/01/08/texas-hair-braiding-instructor-who-fought-licensing-rules-wins-case/

     But, otherwise, perm and weave are another story altogether.  The preference for the latter makes me think of the woman from Chris Rock's film and how she described why she thinks people do not want to wear their hair "nappy/kinky."  Essentially, she said it's not sexy to wear your hair nappy.  Take a look at the video below to hear her comments and beyond:

     There is a part of me that doesn't want to believe that there are actual thoughts like what was stated in the film above about the natural hair of Black women, but indeed there are.  There are some who just don't feel that black women's natural hair is beautiful/sexy/positive.  There are some who believe that it is too hard to manage.  There are some vile thoughts about it, unfortunately, but thank goodness there are the naturalistas and I'm proud to be one of them!   In short, the definition of backsliding is usually a term used to describe a relapse.  So below you will find a young woman who experiences this backsliding situation. Perhaps this video will be of interest to you and from her thoughts about natural hair and backsliding a N.I.C.E. discussion can be held with the understanding that in any setting and in any venue natural hair is beautiful and is always cool enough!

Mrs. Camille Cosby: A Naturalista Speaks, in Love and Strength, as Everything in the Dark Surely Will Come to Light, Eventually

    I don't know too much about Mrs. Camille Cosby, the wife of  Dr.Bill Cosby, except that it appears that she is a regal, dignified, gracious Black woman, wife and mother.  Whenever she is out and about with her husband she looks sophisticated, calm and stylishly elegant, essentially, a Black "Queen" walking amongst us.  They have beautiful children and her and Dr. Cosby lost their only son, a pain that no woman (parents) should have to bare, but as we know from recent and ongoing tragedies, loss of Black young men happens all too often.  Mrs. Cosby is also a naturalista, with her beautiful short cut, wearing her hair grey, naturally and lovely.  Yesterday, she made a statement in regard to her husband, whom she has been married to for a very long time. She stated the following (see full article here:  http://uptownmagazine.com/2014/12/camille-cosby-comes-bill-cosbys-defense/): 

“The man I met, and fell in love with, and whom I continue to love, is the man you all knew through his work. He is a kind man, a generous man, a funny man, and a wonderful husband, father and friend. He is the man you thought you knew.”  

Dr. and Mrs. Cosby with Dr. Johnetta Cole (The Cosby's donated 20 million to Spelman when she was President)

     They are pictured here with Dr. Johnetta Cole, once President of Spelman College (Spelman has announced that it has  suspended its endowed professorship with Cosby) and  now the Director of the Smithsonian Institution's National Museum of Art.  Cole hosted a conversation exhibition of art pieces, many of which were donated by the Cosby's recently.  The statement posted on the museum's website regarding the event is here: (http://africa.si.edu/):  

"We are aware of the controversy surrounding Bill Cosby, who, along with his wife Camille, owns many of the works in the Conversations exhibition. Exhibiting this important collection does not imply any position on the serious allegations that have been made against Mr. Cosby. The exhibition is centrally about the artworks and the artists who created them."

 Mrs. Cosby is by his side, honoring the notion of "for better or for worse" which is a key aspect of the vows taken between a man and a woman upon marriage. Dr. Cosby described her support yesterday of him as follows:  (see full article here: http://www.vanityfair.com/vf-hollywood/2014/12/bill-cosby-breaks-silence-on-rape-allegations): 

"Love and the strength of womanhood. Let me say it again, love and the strength of womanhood. And, you could reverse it, the strength of womanhood and love."

     Now, something has happened that we are struggling to understand.  Statements, accusations, the media and beyond are causing opinions to be formed, without all of the facts emerging in an objective venue.  I genuinely believe that a person is innocent until PROVEN guilty. That is the basis of our justice system (although this matter is not in the court system at this time). As Dr. and Mrs. Cosby begin to slowly raise their voices, perhaps, given that they have given so much to the uplifting of of Black people in America (although many have disagreed with some of Dr. Cosby's candid comments about Black people) through his television and comedic movie ventures, their giving millions to a historically Black college, their cultivation and collection of Black art and so much more, we can be patient and let all of the facts emerge before joining in on the character assassination of this Black man, which is happening so publicly, as his wife stands firmly by his side.  This does not mean that the women accusers should not be heard, or that they should be lambasted too, for telling their stories. Their voices have raised the conversation of women and their experiences with men in power to a new level. However, rushing to judgement, on either side, is irrational, without hearing/knowing the facts, of both sides and without having been there to witness the events firsthand. Many chide Dr. Bill Cosby for not speaking up sooner.  But is the media really the correct venue for him to do so?  It would seem that doing so needs to take place within the context of rules, professional expertise and all that is necessary to lay the groundwork for objectivity on both sides without opinions, biases and everything else that has emerged enabling a "reality TV" atmosphere about something that is so serious. No one wants any woman, or any person in general, to be violated. Compassion and sympathy abounds when we hear of it, but impartiality must be present within the context of hearing, feeling and listening to all sides.

      Although some may have animosity towards Dr. Cosby because they believe the many women who have shared their stories about him, particularly Beverly Johnson, America's first Black Supermodel who stepped forward recently, and others, perhaps equal weight can be given to the voice of Mrs. Cosby, who surely knows her husband better than any other woman, as they have been married for a very long time (since 1964), raised children together and made it to stand amongst us as Black, elders.  Some Black women have stepped forward to ask questions, such as Whoopi Goldberg and Jill Scott. I too have questions and I am writing here to express compassion for Mrs. Cosby, a Black woman, naturalista, sister, and her family during what has to be difficult times for all of them.  For that reason, Mrs. Cosby, a naturalista to the core, N.I.C.E. sees you, hears you and knows that there is a connection in consciousness, with a clear indication, per your naturally coiffed hair, that you know that Natural Is Cool Enough. The perspective of N.I.C.E. is that this speaks volumes about your level of consciousness. Stay strong, faithful and prayerful.  Everything in the dark, eventually comes to light. At the very least, as we watch you during these trying times, the lesson of  the true meaning of "for better or for worse" in a marriage sustained in longevity, strength, love and womanhood, is emerging. 

Study-In Student Demonstration and Demands at the U After Racist, Culturally Incompetent Comments: #BlackStudentsMatter

 The struggle continues through protest throughout the United States.  Yesterday, Congressional Staffers walked out of their offices to make a statement about the recent cases of injustice and  the Black men who have been killed and subsequent lack of indictment of  the police officers who killed two of them. Protests have taken place across the nation, in the streets and on college campuses.  One such campus was mentioned and the students were praised by N.I.C.E. in a previous blog post http://naturaliscoolenough.blogspot.com/2014/12/praise-for-hands-up-rally-for-justice.html) namely, the University of Miami.  What was outlandish about the student's positive, well-organized, well-attended event was that subsequently, racist, culturally incompetent, inappropriate remarks were made about the students and other participants who attended (I was there so I felt personally impacted) through the medium Yik Yak.  See this link for more detail:  http://naturaliscoolenough.blogspot.com/2014/12/after-peaceful-blacklivesmatter-rally.html

     As a result of the Administration not taking concrete steps to address this matter, other than a letter written by the President, Dr. Donna Shalala, which did not condemn such culturally incompetent behavior, in no uncertain terms, but rather referred to such actions within the context of free speech, the students participated in a sit-in, in their campus library, on the night before their first day of finals.  Although President Shalala attended this event, the students await a response to their demands of which excerpts are below.  To get a glimpse of this event and President Shalala's comments during it, watch this video: http://vimeo.com/114281731 entitled "Study-In Demonstration at Richter Library."

Dr. Donna Shalala, President of UM with students at Richter Library Study-In

 

    Within the context of their demands, their are some clear points which many Universities, at large, must begin to comes to terms with.  It is the matter of the need for more Black students, faculty and administrators on predominantly white campuses and why this is important for all students and particularly, Black students.  The students mention in their demands that 8% of the student population at the University of Miami are Black.  They put this in context as follows per their demand document:

• "This statistic is misleading as a large portion of that 8% are student athletes who, due to their rigorous schedules and staff coercion regarding academic and social tracks, are unable to be fully streamlined into the various aspects of campus life. What efforts are being made to recruit Black students outside of athletics? How can those be increased and/or made more effective"

      Furthermore, they also point out the minimal numbers of Black faculty at the university by stating the following:

• "Across all School and Colleges, the vast majority of our Faculty are not representative of the diverse student body they service. In an added detriment, many lack the cultural sensitivity we have come to expect from our institution. We recognize the difficulty in addressing this issue of cultural competency on the part of the faculty, but what is being done to address it from an administrative standpoint? Are courses offered to interested faculty who would like to learn how to better service students with backgrounds that differ from their own? Is there, at minimum, a mandated Cultural Competency course or lecture to set a standard expectation amongst University employees?"

     Here it is necessary to discuss Black Faculty in particular. The question one has to ask is how is diversity defined?  If it is defined technically as a range of difference, then perhaps that is the case at UM.  But if you hone in on the term and ask, within the range of difference, how many Black Faculty and Administrators are there?   More specifically, how many Black Faculty and Administrators are there are at the Coral Gables Campus?  Go further and ask how many Black tenured/tenure earning faculty are there?  How many Black Lecturers and how many Black Adjunct Professors?  Essentially, there is a need to explore the degree of Blackness on campus.  Then you get into some tenuous numbers at best.  If you explore the University of Miami Fact Book, which is available on line, per the UM website  http://www.miami.edu/index.php/Fact_Book_2013-2014, you will find that racial data regarding faculty is not indicated.  It would be helpful to prospective students and current students to know this as they make a decision about whether to attend the school or to assess the quality of their racial experience while there.  Perhaps having more Black faculty and Administrators, V.P.'s and Deans, would alleviate other concerns indicated in the students demands including:

• "Across all School and Colleges, the vast majority of our Faculty are not representative of the diverse student body they service. In an added detriment, many lack the cultural sensitivity we have come to expect from our institution. We recognize the difficulty in addressing this issue of cultural competency on the part of the faculty, but what is being done to address it from an administrative standpoint? Are courses offered to interested faculty who would like to learn how to better service students with backgrounds that differ from their own? Is there, at minimum, a mandated Cultural Competency course or lecture to set a standard expectation amongst University employees?

     As cultural competency is one of my areas of expertise, having written two books on the subject and I am now writing a book on disparities and diversity, I agree with the students 100%.  Cultural competency (skill sets) is imperative, along with increasing numbers of Black faculty and Administrators.  This will go a long way in making sure the students feel welcome and comfortable in the environment where they are paying substantial amounts of money for their education.  Having more Black Faculty and Administrators will also provide the non-Black students with the opportunity to see and dialogue with more Black professionals on campus, which will perhaps curb their notion that Black people are coons, etc. which was one of the negative, racist, culturally incompetent words used to insult those who were protesting against injustice on campus.  Black students would also have more Black role models and experts, in their fields of study and beyond, that they can go to in times of difficulty (as is the case presently as they protest and march for justice).

     Although the data is not present in the UM fact book as to the number of Black faculty, at all levels  and Administrators (Deans and VP's), a simple, albeit time consuming way to ascertain this information is to simply go to the University website, go to each department's site, click on the Faculty link and get the names of all Faculty and Deans.  Most have pictures.  Also, the names of all Administrators (V.P.'s) can also be attained per the University website. A quick perusal will provide a very close "Black headcount," at which time the sparse numbers will be evident.  Diversity is key, but the question at hand is within the  context of diversity at the University of Miami, how many people are Black because #blackeducatorsmatter #blackadministratorsmatter, #blacklivesmatter and #alllivesmatter.

     As society, once again, comes to terms with the atrocities being committed against Black people, it is inevitable that other societal ills will surface.  Hence it is no surprise that the students had other concerns per their demands including:

--> "While we recognize that to a certain extent this must be accomplished on an individual basis, our question is what is the university doing to facilitate the spread of cultures and ideas amongst students"

--> 'What is the university's policy on hate speech and the use of racial, sexist or homophobic slurs? If one exists, it appears to be neither widely known nor enforced amongst the student body.  

--> "Some of our students have experienced harassment by University of Miami police...How are we training our [police] Officers and Emergency Personnel to interact with the diverse body of students that occupy this campus? Is there any student input or post-interaction feedback within that training process, or in the local police department at large?"

     These strong, courageous young, Black students, whom I am proud to say, I have taught many of them, have asked for the following: 

'We would like the university to create a task force specifically related to the ongoing issues of diversity and inclusion of Black students on campus. We would like to see senior administrators on this task force who can respond directly to our concerns and provide a timetable for these concerns to be addressed. We would like student leaders to be well represented on this task force to speak to the student experience regarding the regression, progression, or stagnancy of various aspects of the college experience at the Predominantly White Institution. We would like to include both New and Tenured faculty who can address our academic concerns of the past and work towards a better future, specifically regarding academic experiences."  

 

     They close their letter with hope by stating:  in solidarity and excitement  #blacklivesmatter

A letter was written by President Shalala today and screen saved and posted on Facebook by students.  It's a start but hopefully, the struggle continues with the bigger pictures in mind.

 

     Although, this letter is a possible beginning, one of my former Black students, who is now a medical student, sent this to me, which I think is a fitting way to close this post.  It is entitled: An Open Letter to Black Students #BlackLivesMatter.    N.I.C.E. joins in on this love letter, in natural, consciousness, agreeing with it in totality. #NaturalIsCoolEnoughKnowsBlackStudentsMatter   Definitely a worthy read: http://blackspaceblog.com/2014/12/08/an-open-letter-of-love-to-black-students-blacklivesmatter/

Natural Is Cool Enough Joined Miami Protesters from the Heart, Mind, Body, Consciousness and from the Roots: Stand Up Against Injustice!

     Rather than a lazy day, which is often what I prefer on Sundays, I attended a protest rally, with my husband, which began in the Wynwood area of Miami, in the middle of the Art Basel festivities, on the last day of the art venture.  Interestingly, we had been at Art Basel, gazing at art for the entire evening, the night before.  But the next day, at 3:00, a Protest Rally was scheduled, to deal with the atrocities committed against Black people, namely the Mike Brown and Eric Garner cases, in which the Grand Jury for each of these men, did not indict the officers who killed them. These are just a couple of cases of many, which is tragic.  Therefore, Miami folks joined the cadre of protesters from around the nation, indicating, with strong voices, in no uncertain terms, that Black Lives Matter.

     As a point of clarification, in regard to Black Lives Matter (#Blacklivesmatter), which has become a hashtag, organization and oft repeated protest phrase of late (along with "I can't breathe," the last words repeated by Eric Garner, and "Hands up don't shoot," as Mike Brown was said to have his hands up, per some witnesses, when he was gunned down on the street in his neighborhood) there has been some concern about the use of this term.  Some will say, not only Black lives matter, but all lives matter.  It is clear that all lives matter, but what is not clear is, if all lives matter, why so many Black people (men and women) are being killed by the hands of the police.  The term #Blacklivesmatter is referring to the fact that in addition to everyone else, Black lives matter too, as equally as any other lives.  It's shameful that time has to be spent explaining this in the midst of all of these Black lives that are being brutally ended (boys, girls, women and men) but nevertheless, there is a tendency to nitpick rather than stay focused on the core issue, which is in these cases, the death of Black people per the hands of the police. A very poignant moment at this rally was when Trayvon's Martin's parents joined us and spoke to the crowd.  Our hearts were with them as we listened to their words.

    I do believe that pictures are worth a thousand words, so below are many images of the Miami rally. It was a strong, courageous, intense event, that I am honored to have attended. It felt comforting to stand in the midst of so many people (with my husband by my side) who were of all ages and races and who made a decision, on a beautiful, sunny day in Miami, to march for over 4 hours while demanding justice for Black lives lost and at the very least, making it clear that we will be heard because yes, Black lives matter!  Also, I must mention, in the spirit of N.I.C.E., that there were many sisters and brothers there, adorned with their natural locks, braids, freestyle kink, afros and beyond reinforcing consciousness from the roots making it clear that in any and every situation Natural Is Cool Enough.  I was proud to be there exhibiting that level of consciousness, with my locks.  The struggle continues!

 

Trayvon Martin's Dad

Trayvon Martin's Mom